Five Steps to Self-confidence

 

Here’s a little quiz for you:

When you think about taking the dream that you have and turning it into a business: 

  1. Do you worry that you aren’t talented enough to pull it off?
  2. Do you wrestle with uncertainty?
  3. Are you chicken for no reason?

When you realize that you need to start networking to make connections:

  1. Do you worry that you won’t be able to think of anything to say?
  2. Do you avoid it altogether because you don’t know anyone there?
  3. Do you feel like you have less to offer than everyone else in the room?  

You are giving a presentation to a group:

  1. Do you spend the evening afterwards agonizing over your mistakes?
  2. Do you compare yourself to other speakers and despair that you will ever measure up?
  3. Do you psych yourself out before you speak by imagining that everyone in the audience is more qualified than you?

Lack of self-confidence is a problem that stalks us doesn’t it?  And it comes up in coaching over and over. I think that this is especially true when someone is starting a new venture. But it is also true for people who are experienced in their careers.  

What robs us of self-confidence? Specific thought patterns like:

  • Worry about messing up or failing
  • Worry about what other people think (Will they like it?)
  • Compare and despair (comparing ourselves to others who seem more successful 

Many of us have developed habits or practices of low self-esteem or self-confidence. We are so accustomed to thinking of ourselves in this way that we don’t question it. Even though it is very constraining, it is comfortable. We might say that we even indulge ourselves in feeling incapable and fearful so that it keeps us from having to take actions that are scary. Low self-confidence can become a convenient excuse for inaction.

Self-confidence is a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities and judgment. Can you believe in your ability without yet having been able to practice a particular skill? Can you believe in your perseverance, the tools that you have learned, the training that you have experienced? This is a pre-experience confidence and it is founded on your belief in yourself. Where does our belief system come from? It comes from the thoughts that we think.  

When we move ahead of our doubt, insecurity and fear to accomplish our goal, then we can experience self-confidence based on our results. A feeling of self-confidence comes from the chatter in our brain or our mindset. When we are experienced in something, we actually give ourselves permission to feel self-confident but we could just as easily give our selves permission to feel confident even earlier.

What are the steps to being confident?

  • Develop a hyper awareness of your thoughts and how they influence your feelings.  Thoughts are what determine feelings, so how are you managing your mind? Challenge your thoughts!
  • Determine what you want your opinion of yourself to be so that you can feel confident. Use a daily focus sheet and answer the questions: Who do I want to be? How do I want to feel?
  • Set an intention each day: I choose to be________.  I choose to feel________.
  • Take action to move yourself forward. The results of your action will then fuel your self-confidence.
  • Develop a support system that can give you the support that you need.

Courage is not the absence of fear but taking action despite the fear.

“Feel the fear. Do it anyway.” Helen Keller

Want to learn more about increasing self-confidence?  Listen to the teleseminar career coach, Kathy Brunner and I recently recorded where we talk about Leading your life with courage and self-confidence:

http://lynnewatts.com/confidence

 Ready to take the next step toward developing your dream business?  Dream Achiever Coaching focuses on both your mindset as well as your business strategies.  

Read about it here:  http://lynnewatts.com/coachingforsuccess

Sign up for a free clarity call and see if Dream Achiever Coaching is for you.  Email me at lynnewatts52@gmail.com to set up a Coaching Clarity Call.

 

ellenq

I had lots of ideas, but no idea how to actually take the first step toward making my dream a reality. Lucky for me, the Dream Achiever Coaching program had everything that I needed to begin taking precious baby steps. The strategy sessions clearly identified each next step in an order that made perfect sense. And the mindset sessions gave me the confidence I needed to move forward!

~Ellen Quarles

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Are you being the leader of your life?

I’m going to be honest.  There was a time when I wasn’t a leader in my own life.  I was a follower of everyone and everything.  I looked to others to tell me what career I should go into, what college I should attend and how I should go about finding the perfect job.  I didn’t just learn from others, I leaned on others.  To be more accurate, sometimes I collapsed on them and expected someone to not only tell me how to do something but also what to do.  If they would take the necessary action for me… well I was good with that too.

I was also an expert at waiting; waiting for the perfect time, the perfect opportunity, the perfect invitation, the necessary resources or experience.  I didn’t realize that I was expecting to be rescued or saved.  I thought people who were successful were just lucky or had the right connections.

beach

Be a Leader not a Leaner

Today, I focus on leading my own life.  I’m still a voracious learner but I use the information that I learn into my own decisions and actions.  It has taken a huge mental shift and a lot of missteps to begin living my life in this way.  When I work with clients on determining their calling and the direction they want to go in their lives, I focus on empowering them to be leaders not leaners in their lives as well.

The One Question to Ask

Want to be the best leader you can be in your career, your family and your life? Here is a key question to ask regardless of the situation:

What would a great leader do?  

Here’s why this question is so important.  It takes us out of our own excuses and challenges us to become the best that we really can be.  It elevates us above our own personal circumstances and provides an element of objectivity.  Here’s how:

  • It challenges us to to examine our values and compare them with higher values. It inspires us to align ourselves with how our best selves could act.
  • It reinforces the concept that we must not only come up with a plan but execute the plan.  It’s not enough to just think about what we might do but we must also follow through, even if it means taking imperfect action.
  • It inspires us to be all that we can be by comparing our actions to someone else who is a role model for greatness.  It challenges us to stretch outside of our own comfort zone and crushes our excuses.

So the next time you feel that you are at a road block in any area of your life- career, parenting, relationships, instead of asking what should I do, ask yourself;  what would a great leader do right now?  Then do it. Be the greatest leader in your life.

Want to be the leader of your life?  Need some strategies and support?  Check out my coaching packages.

lizagain
Dream Achiever Coaching changed my style at work with amazing results! Through the DISC personality profile, I was able to identify my strengths and clarify my focus on my job. Lynne had several concrete time management and productivity recommendations that helped me get control of my time. My confidence and productivity have improved tremendously!  ~Liz Chadwick

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The one question you should ask…

lost2

Are you at a cross-roads and wondering what direction to go in?

Are you faced with a difficult decision that will determine your future, your life story?

Are you trying to turn your dream career  into real career?

According to an interview with Dan Sullivan in Success magazine, there is one key question that you can ask that will help you set and accomplish your goal.  Here it is:  If we were to sit down together three years from now, what would have to be in place for you to feel happy and productive about where you are in life?

You can answer this question about any aspect of your life, but lets limit it to your work.  When I work with clients, I also like to downsize the time frame to make it more manageable, so lets think about where you would like to be with your business or career in one year.  Here are some additional questions to make it even more specific:

What work would you be doing?  Be descriptive.

  • Describe who you would be working with.  Describe the ideal client or person that you would best be able to serve.
  • Describe the meaning or message of the work that you would be doing.
  • Describe what gifts you bring to the work
  • Describe the challenges that you might have.
  • Describe the environment that you would be working in.
  • Describe the impact your work would have on the world around you.
  • How much money would you be making?
  • What team members would you need to assist you?
  • Describe a typical day in your work.

Now the next step:  Working backward from the career or business that you just envisioned, begin to list the steps that you would need to take to arrive at the ideal career in one year.  Again be specific.  For example:

Open a business account

Create a business name and logo

Create a website

Develop a client profile

Print business cards

Join a business association and networking groups

Develop an email list

Create a monthly newsletter

You get the idea. Now, begin to categorize the steps into a logical order.  What will you do first?  What can wait until later?  Create a monthly plan.

Finally, have some fun with the process.  Set an intention and write it on a large poster board.  Create a vision board around the intention with lots of pictures and words that describe where you want to be in one year.  When I began writing children’s books, my intention was that in one year I would have written and published a book.  Then everyday, I reviewed my intention and my action plan.  I did one thing to move forward in accomplishing my goal, everyday.  Did it work?  Yes!  Within one year, I had published my first children’s book in the Wyatt the Wonder Dog book series.  Here is my vision board that inspired me:

vision board

I often do vision boards in classes and workshops:

lizbeckyvision Cathysaravision

Now it’s your turn.  Where would you like to be in one year? Can you set an intention?  I’d love to hear in the comments section.

Join me for my next free teleseminar:

Leading your Life from a Place of Confidence and Courage

Do you have a dream, a calling or a vision for your life?

Are you insecure about whether or not you are up for the challenge?

Are you afraid of failing?

Do you worry that you aren’t good enough?

Maybe you feel like giving up altogether…

Then this teleseminar is for you!

Here’s what I’ll cover:

  • Negative mindset messages  and how you can turn them around.
  • How to create success by changing your thoughts and your feelings
  • How you can really feel confident and courageous, no matter the situation

Join Lynne Watts and Kathy Brunner on Sunday May 17th,  at 8:00 pm EST for a special teleseminar

Sign up here:  http://acalledwoman.com/teleseminar

 

 

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Is your mindset keeping you poor?

bills

What are your beliefs about money?  Equally important, what are your beliefs about yourself?  Do you believe that you provide value and quality work?  Do you feel confident in your ability and talent?  Do you believe that you deserve a rich life?  Anyone one of these issues can be a stepping stone or a roadblock to becoming rich.

Avenues to Becoming Rich

There are probably two ways to becoming rich.  One is to save your way into wealth.  This means living a careful frugal life and regularly saving for retirement.  Many people who are not risk takers op for this method.

The other way to become rich is to earn your way. Most of the people who fall into this category have their own business.  In fact, 74% of all millionaires in the United States are self-employed.

Developing a Rich Mindset vs. a Poor Mindset

So how does your mindset impact your earning capacity?  Here are a few ways:

  • Rich people don’t have a mental ceiling on how much money they believe they can earn.  Poor people not only have an income ceiling, a larger amount seems wasteful, ridiculous or impossible.   You will never earn more money than you think you deserve.  This is one reason that most lottery winners are broke within a year or two.  They don’t see themselves as rich people.  They see themselves as lucky people and they soon create circumstances that take them back to their previous economic state.
  • Rich people see opportunities all around to  increase income and provide service and value to others.  They think and live from a position of abundance.  What our brain believes to be true, it looks for evidence of in the world around us.  Poor people live from a mindset of scarcity and not only do they fail to see opportunities, they fail to create or take advantage of them.
  • Rich people take responsibility for their circumstances.  They see themselves as creating the life that they want to live.  Poor people assign blame for their circumstances.  They may blame their upbringing, the environment they live in, the economy, the government,  (the list is endless).  Whenever, you are tempted to say, “I can’t because… ” remember the many examples of wealthy people today who lived a poor disadvantaged childhood yet overcame their circumstances to create a better life.  They weren’t “lucky”, they were intentional and determined.
  • Rich people are investors.  Not just in stocks and financial tools but in themselves.  They are avid learners and don’t mind spending money to improve themselves and their knowledge.  People with a poor mindset spend money on themselves, people with a wealthy mindset spend money improving themselves.
  • People with a rich mindset take calculated risks.  They are continuously moving forward rather than looking for security and status quo.  They expect failure and take it in stride as a stepping stone along the way.  People with a  poor mindset try to “get by” rather than “get ahead.”  They tend to see failure as a dead end and a place to give up.

So is your mindset keeping you stuck?   Which one of these mindsets is a stumbling block?  I’d love to hear in the comments.

Join me in the next free teleseminar:  Living your Life from a Place of Confidence and Courage  Yep, we’ll be talking a lot about mindset again and how it affects our emotions.

Last week to sign up for our Maximize Your Momentum Mastermind group where career coach, Kathy Brunner and I will be helping new entrepreneurs develop millionaire mindsets and strategies.  We’ve got a great group so far and would love for you to make it even greater… (see point #4).

Get the details here:  http://acalledwoman.com/masterminddeets

Grab your seat here:  http://acalledwoman.com/mastermind

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guess who I ate lunch with today?

shannon miller

It’s not often that you get to eat lunch with the most decorated gymnast in U.S. history.  Today was a special day for me as I attended a luncheon at Foxtale Book Shoppe where Shannon Miller was promoting her book, It’s Not About Perfect, Competing for my Country and Fighting for my Life.  Lucky for me, I got to sit right next to her and learn all the details about the amazing gymnastics career that took her from a shy, emotional little girl growing up in Oklahoma to a focused, confident, world famous two-time Olympic athlete.

shannon luncheon

Shannon was a member of the 1996 USA Olympic gymnastics team, the Magnificent Seven which won the first-ever Olympic team gold medal in women’s gymnastics. Shannon also won a gold medal in the balance beam, performing perhaps the best and most memorable event of her life.  Over her entire career, she won seven Olympic medals and nine World Championship medals along with many other international and national medals.

However, becoming an Olympic gold medalist was not her greatest victory.  In 2010 as a young mother, she was diagnosed with a rare form of ovarian cancer that required surgery and chemotherapy.  While she was devastated by the diagnosis, many of the earlier life habits that made her the athlete she was as a young woman, served her well as she took on this new challenge.

Today, Shannon Miller is cancer free and the president and founder of Shannon Miller Lifestyle, a company dedicated to helping women make their health and wellness a priority.  Here are three of the characteristics that she identifies as being instrumental in surviving the many challenges that she has faced.

  • Set goals–As a young gymnast, her coach had all the athletes periodically write down their goals on index cards and post them where they would be reminded of them.  Shannon attributes her success to always having a new goal that she was working toward.
  • Focus on giving your best effort in the present.  It’s not about being perfect, it’s about doing your best.  Whenever she made a mistake, Shannon learned to quickly brush it off and refocus for the next move or the next event.  Consistent action over time produces results.
  • Hard work and persistence are more important than talent.  The energy, time and effort that Shannon put into her passion was rewarded with real  results.  Her dedication and love of gymnastics shines through even today, many years since her retirement.

We don’t all have a passion for gymnastics but we all have something that we are gifted in.  What characteristics do you think are important to be successful?  I’d love to hear in the comments section.

 

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Are you in? Only three spaces left!

dog sunbathing on a deck chair with red umbrella

Charles Schultz was a genius at bringing big concepts down to everyday life. In one comic strip, Lucy says to Charlie,

“You know, Charlie, life is like a deck chair.

Some people place their deck chair so they can see where they’re going.

Some turn it around to see where they’ve been.

Others, Charlie, place their deck chair right in the middle of the action to see what’s going on all around them.”

Charlie sighs and says, “I’m just trying to get mine unfolded.”

The next question of course is where are you in the story?

The Called Woman Conference 2015–Because you are worth it!

Saturday, April 25th is the fourth annual Called Woman Conference.  When I started the conference four years ago, my purpose was to help women find their calling and reinvent their lives. I wanted to provide the kind of experience, encouragement and empowerment that I wished I had when I began to examine my life’s work.  That mission hasn’t changed.  

I believe that we all have a calling, a mission in life.  Sometimes we know that calling with clarity and focus. Sometimes it may seem foggy and unclear.  Sometimes we know our calling but fear, doubt and a lack of confidence holds us back from stepping into the person that we know we can be.  The purpose of the conference to address these issues no matter whether your deck chair is open or closed, facing forward or backward.  Here’s what one participant had to say about the conference last year:

sara testimonial Here’s the link to watch:  https://vimeo.com/91004252

Expanding the world of possibilities, building on the past and reaching with excitement and anticipation toward the future.  That’s what the Called Woman Conference 2015 is all about.  Are you ready to join us?  Let’s get those deck chairs open.  Only three spaces left!

Here’s the details:

http://acalledwoman.com/CWCdeets

Here’s where you sign up:

http://acalledwoman.com/CWC2015

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Three Ways to Be Mentally Strong

Success Word on License Plate Follow to Successful Future

If you are starting a new venture, a new career or any new endeavor you probably spend a lot of time checking into the the strategy involved in being successful.

Got a new job?  You might learn about the culture in the business or the procedures that are involved.

Creating a new product that you want to sell?  You probably research how to market and connect with your ideal customers.

Need to meet new contacts or clients?  You might learn about the best places to network or what to do when you get there.

Guess what we don’t usually think much about?  Creating the right mindset for being successful.

It seems a little too woo-woo

It seems too vague.

Guess what usually brings us down in our new venture?  Mindset.  Not that we recognize it.  Instead we blame the economy or our co-workers, or our boss or even ourselves for being inadequate.  Behind it all though is the beliefs that we entertain about ourselves and our world.

Employees with special skills wanted concept - job interview candidates waiting

The Secret Sauce for Success

Mindset is the secret sauce for success.  Not only does it have enormous power in our lives, it is also one thing that we can totally control.

What can we not change?  Many times we cannot change our circumstances.  Circumstances like being the oldest child in our family.  Or the age we are.  Or the type of upbringing we had.  Some circumstances of course we can change.  We hate our job or our boss is overbearing and degrading.  We can leave our job.  We are in a relationship that is abusive or non-supportive.  We can leave the relationship.

While we can’t always change our circumstances, we can always change our thinking.  Our brains and how we use them are under our control and by default so are our feelings or emotions.  Our thoughts create our feelings which ultimately determines our actions.  Pretty amazing how much control and power we have isn’t it?

Creating a Strong Mindset

There a several ways that we can develop a strong mindset which will ensure success in other areas.  Here are three practices to stay mentally strong:

  1. Don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself— Feeling sorry for yourself is giving away your power.  You are arguing with reality and telling the universe that it should operate differently.  Instead consider the situation research and development.  Learn from the situation and begin anew more intelligently.
  2. Don’t fear taking calculated risks–Success involves change and growth.  Tiny seeds make big changes to become grown plants.  Caterpillars struggle to break out of a comfortable cocoon without knowing the beautiful future ahead.  Without change and the risk of failure there is is no success.
  3. Don’t resent other’s success–When we compare ourselves to others and resent their success we are operating from a scarcity mindset.  We are in essence saying, “They got a raise and a new position and now there is less available for me.”  Don’t make other’s success about you.  Instead celebrate their gain and know that there is enough available in the world for you to be successful as well.

What ever your challenge, your future goals, make sure that you give as much attention to the mindset that you have going forward.  Strategy is important but recognizing the power of our beliefs about ourselves may make or break the deal.

meKathyCWC

The Called Woman Conference 2015–Because You Are Worth It!

Have you had a dream for so long–you wonder if you should just give up on it ever coming true?

Have you tried a few things and found that they just didn’t work?

Are you frustrated and overwhelmed with the idea of making a change…even though you know you desperately need one?

Do you just wonder where to start?

The Called Woman Conference can help.

If you have been to the Called Woman Conference in the past, you already know what an amazing day it is. Well, this year will be no different.

In fact, this year will most likely be the BEST CONFERENCE EVER, and you know WHY?  Because this year we are focusing on creating Individual Action Plans for everyone who attends. We’ve talked about finding your purpose and going after your dreams before, but this time we want to make sure you leave with a STEP by STEP plan to achieve that in as little time as possible.

meDISC2013c

We have created an extremely interactive 4 HOURS to pack an incredible toolbox for you to use specific to your goal.  We will take you through a step by step process and when the day is over,  you will have the blueprint and tools you need to go out and grab your best life now.

Kathy2013b

Skills You will Learn

You will:

  • develop clarity of purpose
  • create priority management techniques
  • eliminate mindset messages that hold you back
  • learn how to maintain the momentum you’ve achieved
  • create a step by step action plan

 

Join us for a VERY SPECIAL CALLED WOMAN  CONFERENCE…Because You’re Worth It.

This will be the most individualized, intensive day  of building your dream you can ever imagine. We promise or we will gladly refund your money.

The Details 

Join us on Saturday April 25th from 9:00 am to 1:00pm at the

MUST Ministries Administration Building

1407 Cobb Parkway NW

Marietta, Georgia 30062

Ready to take the next step?

$49.95 register here.

BRINGING A FRIEND? We’d love you to!

$79.95 for BOTH of You!

Bring your mom, sister, colleague, BFF, daughter or grand­daughter.

Register here.

Can’t attend but want a recording of the conference?

$19.99 for DVD of the conference.

Invest in yourself and your future–you will be changing your life forever.

Come with an idea, a dream, a goal, a decision, a purpose…

LEAVE WITH THE TOOLBOX that will make it happen.

Can’t wait to see you there. April 25th…the day you walk in half empty and leave

overflowing.

Lynne and Kathy

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Sarah Spruill- A Life of Love

Sometimes I get so busy, I forget to be.

To enjoy the moment.

To savor the relationships.

Sarah BD

Then something happens that jerks me back to reality.

April 11th at 5:00 in the morning I got a phone call from the nursing home where my mother in law lives.  When they went in to take her vital signs, she was gone. She had passed away in her sleep.  One tear on her cheek.  A big smile on her face.

Sarah Xmas

The past couple of years have been difficult for her as her dementia worsened.  I’ve written before about the nightmare of moving her out of her apartment of  twenty years and finding placement for her, but once she settled into her new home, her true nature came out.

She loved her family.  “You’re family and I love you with all my heart, ” she told all of us over and over.

She thought every other resident in the nursing home was a family member and she spent her time caring for them.

Sarah apt

Pushing them around in their wheelchairs.

Helping them find their lost shoe or purse.

Lamenting  over the difficulties of life.

She thought her roommate, Grace, with the deep gravelly voice was her nephew, Tim.  On each visit she told me he had been sick and he had just returned from the hospital.  I didn’t argue.

Sarah Shelby Ruby

Whenever her sister Shelby visited from out of town, she urged to her to stay and spend the night.  “There’s plenty of beds here,” she’d say.

Sarah and Hayley

She loved to socialize.  She had friends everywhere.  Even when she barely knew who I was she’d always greet me with, “I’m so glad you came to see me.”   She always thanked me for coming when I left.

Sarah and Laura

In the end, she just faded away.  Less mobile.  Less talkative. I’d ask her what she was thinking and she’d look up startled. “I don’t know” she’d say.

In her last phone conversation with her sister, she told Shelby, “I got to go, Alton’s coming to get her.”  We didn’t realize that she was right.

Sarah Frances Spruill.

Mother in Love.

You were loved.

 

 

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There’s no Age Limit to Dreaming

I’ve been busy preparing for the upcoming Called Woman Conference which is Saturday, April 25th (I hope you will join us) and in doing that I reviewed some of the video testimonials that participants made last year.  Here’s one that really touched me because it is so personal and spoken from the heart.  See if you can catch what I’m talking about:

sandi

Here’s the link:  http://acalledwoman.com/testimonial/

Did you hear it?  Weren’t you inspired by Sandi saying, “Although I’m well into my senior years, that doesn’t mean that I don’t have dreams.  I still have much that I want to accomplish and I find that inspiration at the Called Woman Conference. “

Achieving dreams knows no age limitations.  In fact, sometimes it is in our later years that we really hit our stride and begin accomplishing our heart felt goals.

raemohrmann

Meet Rae Mohrmann.

Marathon runner.

Set a goal of running a marathon in all fifty states,when she was 52 years old.

Accomplished it… at age 62.

Will run her 100th marathon April 12th in St Louis.

Her next goal?

Run a marathon with three generations, her son and grandson.

What is your dream?  

Maybe its not running a marathon but I bet it’s something.  Learn to paint? Write a book?  Develop your own business? Create an organization to help your favorite charity?

Think it’s impossible?  You’re too old?  too young?  Don’t have the resources? Missed your window of opportunity?

Rae started running at age 30.  She was a full time teacher and a single parent when she started out running around her apartment building.  She eventually expanded her running program but she didn’t run her first marathon until age 49. When someone pointed out to her that she would be almost 80 by the time she could meet her goal of running with three generations of her family, guess what she replied?  “Well, I’m going to be almost 80 anyway, so why not?”

Here’s the motto on her refrigerator:  Things turn out the best for those who make the best of how things turn out.  Don’t you just love that?

I’m dedicated to making sure things turn out the best for you. Let’s work together and make your goals come true. I’m holding that space for you to step into your dream.

Here’s what’s coming up:

meKathyCWC

Free Teleseminar Series:  Maintaining the Momentum

Following your dream, your passion is energizing, exciting and rewarding.

It can also be exhausting, frustrating and downright discouraging.

Sometimes you feel like you take two steps forward and three steps back.

Sometimes you wonder if it is EVER going to work out.

Maybe you feel like giving up altogether…

Then this teleseminar is for you! Get the details and sign up here:  http://acalledwoman.com/teleseminar

networking3

The Called Woman Conference 2015–Because You Are Worth It!

Have you had a dream for so long–you wonder if you should just give up on it ever coming true?

Have you tried a few things and found that they just didn’t work?

Are you frustrated and overwhelmed with the idea of making a change…even though you know you desperately need one?

Do you just wonder where to start?

The Called Woman Conference is designed to help you take the next step.

Get the details here:  http://acalledwoman.com/CWCdeets

Register here:  http://acalledwoman.com/CWC2015

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Four Road Blocks to Success

If you want to win, you’ve got to start. ~John Maxwell

Do you have trouble getting started?

Do you have an idea that has been a dream for a while, maybe even a few years, but you’ve just never gotten around to doing anything about it?

Maybe you took a step or two in that direction but ran up against a road block and quit.  You’re not sure if you should even keep trying.  Was the road block a sign that you should give it up?

Maybe you’ve been stopped dead in your tracks by an unexpected event?  a family member’s actions that were totally un-expected?  a change in routine?  a bump in your career path?

In the movie A Bug’s Life, the ants are stopped short by a road block, a leaf in their path.  Here’s how the problem is solved:

abugs life

I spent years staring at a leaf in my path as I tried to publish my children’s books.  I truly felt that some day, some way the obstacle would magically disappear and when it didn’t I continued waiting.  Much like in the ants in the movie, it took someone telling me to “Walk around the leaf!”  before I started considering all my options and began moving forward.

What about you?  Is there an obstacle in your path?  Are you waiting for something to happen?  While getting started is an action step, many times it is our internal critical voice that prohibits us from taking that first step.

Four Key Roadblocks to Getting Started

Not knowing exactly what you want. If you haven’t yet set a goal it’s hard to achieve. Many times we distract ourselves by identifying so many possibilities that we are overwhelmed with the choices. We say things like, “I could do anything…if I only knew what it was that I wanted to do.” This involves giving ourselves permission to take imperfect action. Pick one or two goals and put 100% of your effort into achieving it. You can always backtrack to other minor goals later.

We know what we want but we are afraid to commit to it. We are afraid we may fail. We secretly have a desire, a goal but we are afraid that if others knew about it, we would be turned down, rejected, embarrassed. This involves giving ourselves permission to make mistakes.  When things don’t work out we say things like, “I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.” or “I guess I’m just not cut out for this.” We are actually cheating ourselves with this one. The universe is often more willing to support us in achieving our goals than we recognize.

We are afraid of success. Just as fear of failure can paralyze us, so can fear of success. What if we don’t really know what to do, how to act, how to perform? What if we are overwhelmed with the responsibility of success, the amount of time and energy that it requires? What if we are successful and it turns out not to be what we expect it to be? This fear involves giving ourselves permission to be vulnerable.  Again our internal voice is paralyzing us with what if questions. We may say, “What if I succeed and everyone thinks I know everything and then find out I don’t?” We fail to recognize the flexibility, the power and the control that we have in any given situation.

We know what we want but we don’t know the steps, or the way to achieve it. This is a research question. There is always someone who has gone before us in all that we do. We need to find a role model and connect with them to discover how they were successful. We can then design our own way.  This involves giving ourselves permission to invest in ourselves because we are worth it. So often we fail to move forward because we don’t feel that we are worth the money, time or energy that it takes to learn and grow exponentially.

Sound like a daunting job? It is difficult but not impossible. Roadblocks can be cleared and the road paved for success. Where do you want to be this time next year?  in five years?  Give yourself permission to take imperfect action, invest in yourself, be vulnerable and make mistakes.  Walk around the leaf…

Need some help walking around your self-limiting beliefs?

dreamachiever

Attend the Called Woman Conference 2015–Because You Are Worth It!

If you have been to the Called Woman Conferences in the past, you already know what an amazing day it is. Well, this year will be no different. In fact, this year will most likely be the BEST CONFERENCE EVER!

WHY? Because this year we are focusing on creating Individual Action Plans for everyone who attends. We’ve talked about finding your purpose and going after your dreams before, but this time we want to make sure you leave with a STEP by STEP plan to achieve that in as little time as possible.

Read more about the conference here:

http://acalledwoman.com/CWCdeets

Sign up to attend here:

http://acalledwoman.com/CWC2015

Looking for a coach to help you walk around the leaf?  Check out my coaching plans:

http://lynnewatts.com/coachingforsuccess

 

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